Mother's Day Mayhem

It has been awhile since I've posted, but I really haven't had much to say. There's been a lot going on, surprisingly, but I haven't felt the urge to post, until now.

Mother's Day was less than ideal, you know, what mother's dream of. My first one - with a child not in utero, as I did get a wonderful "First Mother's Day" celebration last year when I was five months pregnant; it made me feel very loved and like I was a mother already (which I technically was) - but as for this year, it will probably be the last worst Mother's Day as my husband now knows he made a big boo-boo.

Ryan did absolutely nothing besides a card that was just from him, and even though he had to work, he still completely flaked on the whole holiday. The card was nice but he usually gets one for me from Sam as well like he did for Christmas, V-Day and Easter. This was the part that made me most upset; it is a day celebrating mothers and the only thing I wanted was a card from my baby girl. The card wasn't even signed from Samantha as well. For two weeks prior to the day I reminded him of the impending holiday because Ryan has a horrible memory, and although I hate having to remind him to "remember me", I know he needs me to do so. I also reminded him that all I wanted was a card from Sam, and he promised that the day would be special. We were also supposed to go out to brunch after he got off of work that morning, which I also reminded him of the previous night, but we didn't do that either. His excuse for everything? "I forgot". He remembered to get a card for me and his mother days prior to Sunday, which is huge because he usually does his shopping the day of. Another big thing is that he actually bought his mother a card which is usually my job. How can he remember his mother but not his wife? As he left for work, I was crying so hard I couldn't talk or see, and he didn't bat an eye. My heart was breaking, but I cleared my eyes and dressed Samantha up so we could go celebrate on our own. We went to the store and Sam got me a card, we bought balloons because I discovered that my little girl is captivated by balloons, as she has never really seen a balloon before. The last balloon she had was when she was hospitalized at two weeks old, and of course a sick baby that young doesn't care about balloons. We also bought some outfits for Sam because there is nothing I love more than shopping for baby clothes.

My mum was defending him saying guys aren't capable of such things which is just a BS excuse because I know plenty of guys who care. (i.e. ProfoundlySeth's El, WhenHelloMeansGoodbye's Katie, or KayleighAnneFreeman's Aimee - They all have amazing husbands who go above and beyond to show they care) Ryan "forgets" a lot of special days for me, and for our family. If he doesn't forget, he just doesn't care. It hurts, more than he understands. Holidays were super important to my family growing up and now I am married to someone who doesn't care if we celebrate or not. I've told him time and time again, but I think this time he finally got it because I was actually on my way to booking a flight home to begin an informal separation from him. Sound extreme? Well, after two and a half years of "forgetting", it sometimes takes something drastic to knock some sense into people. I love my husband, and he is the best father I know (seriously) but I don't want him to make Samantha feel the way I do on her special days. I am a caring, loving person who does all I can to make others feel loved and important, and all I ask of him is that he try.

With that said, he did make it up to me the next day by laying a single red rose, a Teddy bear and an outfit for Sam next to me on the bed so that when I woke up I'd find them. I had already forgiven him the night before because he was at my side when it really mattered. That, my friends, is more important than cards or presents. You see, on Sunday night, our deaf cat Missy attacked me without provocation. Since she is deaf, the littlest things can frighten her, and we usually don't know what that is. But she bit me on my nose and scratched my hand and face. Her teeth got the inside of my nostril, which was bleeding like crazy as was my face and hand. I was hysterical because she scared the living daylights out of me; I was practically having an anxiety attack. I called Ryan, who was on patrol, and within two minutes he and his partner, Officer T, were at our house. Officer T wouldn't leave until I let him look at my wounds. Ry was going to put Missy in her cage but she had run under the stairs so he couldn't get her. But there was my husband, by my side, when I needed him the most. That is what really counts.

To make it an even more stressful day, while Samantha and I were out shopping, I got into a car accident, but both cars were mostly okay. I had Samantha in the truck with me, and all that happened was our license plate got bent. The other car had a bump and mark on their car, but they didn't care. They just wanted to make sure everyone was okay. I am soooo glad they didn't want my info because a) I don't have a valid license because I haven't renewed mine yet and b) I am not on Ry's insurance. God certainly blessed me that day.